


Fights in the Dark

by kijikun



Series: How to Raise the Anti-Christ During an Apocalypse [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Episode: s05e06 I Believe The Children Are Our Future, Kid Fic, M/M, Season/Series 05
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-18
Updated: 2011-12-18
Packaged: 2017-10-27 11:48:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/295516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kijikun/pseuds/kijikun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jesse goes with the Winchesters. Dean must deal with how much the boy is starting to mean to him and how much he’ll give up to keep him safe. If that wasn’t enough there’s this weird thing with Cas...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fights in the Dark

Dean almost expects they won’t see Jesse again when he goes up the stairs to say goodbye to his parents. He’s just a kid, for all his powers. Dean half expects they’ll go up those stairs and find the kid and his parents gone, zapped somewhere safe.

“Do you think this is wise, Dean?” Cas asks.

Dean shrugs his shoulders. “I’ve raised a kid before,” he says looking over at Sam. “He turned out pretty alright.”

Sam looks away and Dean wonders if they’ll ever get back what they had before Ruby and her blood. He misses his brother.

Cas looks uncertain, but if he plans on saying anything else it’s prevented by Jesse coming down the stairs. He’s got a duffel bag almost the same size as himself crammed full of stuff.

 

“Traveling light, kid?” Dean tries to joke, moving forward to take the bag.

Jesse holds on tightly to it. “They won’t remember me,” he says. “I mean, they will, but not really. I can’t make the whole town forget they had a kid.”

Dean’s pretty sure Jesse can but he’s not going to press the issue. Just so long as there not a big missing persons search for the kid. That would be awkward with the Winchester criminal record.

“The bag must be heavy,” Cas says, wrapping his hand around the handle. “I will carry it for you.”

To Dean amazement, Jesse lets him.

“C’mon, it’s a two days drive to Bobby’s,” Dean says, he gives Jesse a smile. “You’ll like Bobby.”

“Is he like your dad or something?” Jesse asks curiously.

Dean gives a nod. “Yeah, or something.”

***

Jesse slides into to their weird little family like he’s a missing puzzle piece. Dean expected more problems. Jesse’s young after all. He’s supposed to be eleven but he acts younger in some ways. Cas says it's because of Jesse's nature. He matures more slowly than a normal human child.

 

So, yeah, Dean’s expecting water works over missing his folks, over living in a strange old house in a junk yard with a strange old man.

Not that he’s going to tell Bobby he ranks as a strange old man.

But Jesse seems to thrive. He reads anything Bobby gives him and is eager to help Dean with the Impala. He’s stand-offish from Sam and Dean wonders if it’s because Sam’s Lucifer’s vessel, but Cas said cambions would align with Lucy so that doesn’t make much sense.

But Jesse isn’t anything like Cas thought either.

Cas spends a good deal of time with Jesse, teaching him to control his power. Sometimes Cas takes Jesse with him on trips to search for God.

“It is good for us to bond,” Cas told Dean once when he asked. “As you bond with him over Batman and the Impala. I want him to feel a connection not based on violence and war.”

Dean patted Cas’ back and gave him a half grin. “Yeah, were not going to repeat our Dads’ mistakes.”

If Cas had leaned a little into Dean’s touch, if Dean’s hand had lingered, well they didn’t talk about it. Just like they don’t talk about how Jesse has a habit of grabbing both their hands when he wants to show them something.

They don’t talk about a lot of things.

Like the fact Jesse might be their only weapon against Lucifer.

***

“Mind taking care of the guns tonight?” Dean asks Sam as they pull into Bobby’s. “I promised Jesse I’d watch more Batman the Animated series with him before he went to bed.”

Sam rolls his eyes. “Maybe you should just let him stay up a bit later.”

“Dude, you know Bobby’s got strict bedtimes. Remember when we were kids? He hasn’t changed since then,” Dean points out.

Sam’s quiet, and it’s the type of quiet Dean hates. “You and Cas have got to stop treating him like a normal kid,” Sam says in a quiet regretfully tone. “He’s probably our only chance again Lucifer outside the Colt.”

“He’s a little kid,” Dean says gritting his teeth.

“He’s eleven!” Sam points out. “And he’s got powers even Cas doesn’t have. You were hunting at eleven.”

Dean slams his hand against the steering wheel. “And it was a shit thing for dad to do,” he snaps. “You got a childhood, Sam, more than I ever had. So don’t you _dare_ ask me to steal away Jesse’s. He’s here so we can protect him not use him.”

“Dean, I’m not saying that!” Sam protests voice a little raw, like Dean struck a nerve. “But -- “

Dean yanks open the Impala door with more force than needed. “But nothing. I’ll damn well say the magic word to Michael before I send a little boy to kill the devil.”

He slams the door after himself and storms inside.

***

Cas kisses him one night.

An episode of Beast Wars just ended and Jesse is conked out between them. Dean looks over at the angel -- still an angel even though he falls faster every day -- and Cas kisses him.

Just leans across Jesse’s sleeping body and presses his mouth, dry and hot, to Dean’s.

Dean jerks back, the movement pulling his arm out from under Jesse’s head waking boy.

“Is it over?” Jesse asks sleepily.

Dean stares at Cas even as he nods. “Yeah, just went off, buddy.”

Cas rises to his feet. “I need to continue my search,” he says without looking at Dean. He disappears in the blink of an eye.

“What’s wrong?” Jesse asks with a slight frown. Cas is by far the kid’s favorite.

Dean shakes his head. “Nothing, Cas is just -- moody lately. He’ll be okay,” Dean lies. Cas isn’t going to be okay. Cas is falling and then he pulls a stunt like that? The hell? “C’mon, bed time.”

“Awww,” Jesse whines. “But you go back on a hunt tomorrow. Just one more?”

Bobby will scowl something fierce but Dean doesn’t have the heart to say no. “Okay, one more then bed.” He leans forward and sets up the laptop to play another episode.

 

***

“I could say it,” Dean says one night, outside under the stars outside some rundown motel like the millions that populate Dean’s life.

Cas is almost a shell of what he once was. He’s starting to need to sleep. Jesse watches him with large concerned eyes when they’re home. The power lessons come less and less because Cas just doesn’t have power to spare. Gabriel’s taken over but he mostly teaches Jesse fun things. And Dean refuses to use the boy has a weapon. Refuses to even think about it.

Cas inhales sharply, but Dean doesn’t look over at him. “We have options,” Cas says in voice that’s almost too even. “Gabriel’s plan for the rings --”

“Is a long shot, even Gabe thinks so,” Dean tells him. “If I...if I say it. I could set terms. I could make sure you guys are taken care of.”

“No.” Cas’ voice goes sharp, dangerous.

Dean looks at him then. Cas’ face is drawn and he’s staring at Dean like Dean just stabbed him. “It’s an option. We can’t rule it out.”

“No,” Cas hisses , grabbing Dean by the shoulder. “I will not allow you to throw away everything.”

“Cas, it’s just -- man, I’m not signing up to be a meat-suit yet,” Dean argues, but he will. If it comes to that.

Cas might not be able to read thoughts anymore but he seems to know what Dean’s thinking and slams him down, pins him to the hood of the Impala. “You would throw away all the sacrifices everyone has made. The risks Gabriel has taken, the things _I_ have done for you?”

Dean reaches up intending to push at Cas’ shoulder. “I don’t want -- “ _you to burn. Jesse to burn. Sam to burn_. But the words don’t come out because Dean’s smashing his mouth to Cas’.

It’s more teeth than anything and Cas is immobile above him for too long before he moves into action. Then he’s practically devouring Dean’s mouth, their teeth bumping. Dean tastes blood but isn’t sure if it’s his or Cas.

Dean moans low in his throat.

Cas is off him in a second. “I didn’t intend -- “ Then he’s gone.

Dean swears a blue streak.  


***

Dean watches Cas paint sigils with his own blood across the windows of the darkened room. He wonders how many of them are meant to keep angels out and how many are meant to keep _him_ in.

“We got Gabriel down to the panic room. Sam’s with him,” Dean says. He wants to warn Cas that he doesn’t heal like he used too, but he doesn’t think Cas _cares_. “He stopped bleeding, whatever you did helped..”

Cas paused. “Lucifer cut off one of his wings. I had to cauterize it.” He goes back to his blood painting.

Dean closes his eyes and rubs his forehead. “Jesse’s asleep finally. He’s in Bobby’s room,” Dean pauses. “He healed up just fine from what Lucifer did.”

“Lucifer should not have been able to touch him,” Cas hisses. “If I hadn’t been trapped in that ring of fire...”

“You’d be dead,” Dean says bluntly. “We got lucky, Cas. We got real lucky.”

Cas tilts his head to the side even though he’s not looking at Dean. “Lucky,” he says like the words a curse.

“Can we at least discuss this?” Dean asks finally, tired to dancing around the subject. “The Colt didn’t work. Jesse -- he’s just a kid it’s not even an option especially after today. We don’t have Death’s ring. We’re screwed Cas, unless....”

“Shut up,” Cas snaps.

Dean stalks up to Cas and grabs his shoulder. “No, you're going to listen to me, because this might be the only thing that saves you.”

“I don’t want to be saved!” Cas yells, spinning around to face Dean. “And most certainly not at that cost!”

“You aren’t even listening to reason!” Dean growls back, pointing an angry finger towards Cas’ chest.

Cas bats his hand away. “Do you think any of us would thank you for saving us like that? Do you think Jesse would understand why you’re abandoning him?”

“It’s not abandoning him! It’s saving him!” Dean yells. “I’m not having him live in that future I saw or risk him being killed by your brothers. I’m not risking Sam saying yes. I’m not risking --”

“Stop it!” A new voice yells from the doorway.

Dean and Cas jerks there heads towards it. Jesse stands there in his batman PJ’s eyes red, tears streaking down his face. “Stop fighting. Please stop fighting.”

Dean takes a step forward. “Jesse, it’s not -- we’re not --” But they are fighting and shit how much did he hear?

“I’ll be better,” Jesse cries. “I’ll be real good. Just stop fighting. Just don’t go away, Dean.”

Tears suddenly prick the back of Dean’s eyes and he crosses the floor to Jesse. “We’re not fighting about you. You haven’t done anything wrong,” he tells the Jesse. He pulls the boy into a hug. “I promise you haven’t done a thing wrong.”

Jesse wraps his arms around Dean, his tears wetting Dean’s shirt. “Cas said you were going away, I don’t want you too. I don’t want you and Cas to split up.”

Dean is stunned. “Jesse,” he starts, but he doesn’t know what to say. Because he was thinking about going away. But him and Cas? There’s nothing there to split up.

Cas’ fingers stroke through Jesse’s hair in a soothing manner. “Dean and I are not splitting up,” he says softly. “We were merely disagreeing on something. We’ve had many fights but we’ve never broken our bond.”

 _Bond?_

But there’s a hand print on Dean’s shoulder and somehow the news that he has a bond with Cas isn’t that shocking. This bond of theirs could use more of the kissing and less of the fighting.

Jesse sniffs. “So still love each other?”

Dean finds himself nodding. “Take more than a fight to make us stop,” Dean promises. “And we still love you.”

Jesse buries his head in Dean’s shirt again. Cas shifts closer, settling a hand over Dean’s hand were it rests on Jesse’s back.

“You are the most important thing to us,” Cas whispers.

And suddenly Dean understands why his father made his deal. Dean had been the most important thing.

Dean bows his head and lets himself cry along with Jesse. They have to win this.

They have to.


End file.
